Wednesday, February 1, 2012

HUMP DAY PUMP UP: SHOPPING!

Dog.

Listen.

We're serious here. Seriously ready to get PUMPED. It's early February and the weather has been WARM AS FUCK. Like it's colder laying in my bed than it is outside. Wrap your head around that. Or don't, because our landlord controls the thermostat and doesn't believe in heat.

Global warming may be a hoax, but it's here and hitting hard this winter - super warm, hardly any snow, hatred simmering below the surface everywhere you look.

But check this out, ferk the weather, we're talking about shopping here.

I love shopping and I love buying stuff. Heckyeahwoman would gladly skip the shopping part if she could fast forward to the buying stuff part.

That's not the point, the point is that this has been good last couple of days, shopping-wise. On Saturday, I bought a computer (scroll down a post to get the low down on that). But not just that, I bought my first laptop. I am now posting from it. In fact, Monday's post about my new laptop is my first post with the new laptop.

METAPUMP

No more banging on my keyboard because my shitty adapter isn't catching the landlord's wifi signal. No more constant crashing, just NONSTOP STREAMING PORN IN HD MOTHERFUCKERS (sorry mom).

What, just cause I maxed out my credit card last weekend doesn't mean I'm gonna stop SPENDIN' SPENDIN' SPENDIN'! Nah, I've come too far to let up now. The PUMP is PUMPIN'.

The spendboner may be raging.

MOAR SHOPPING

Today we are heading to JC Penneys to hit up their new pricing structure. Yes, JCP is changing up their every day pricing - so that every item is at least 40% off. You may recall me noting that I CONSTANTLY RECEIVE COUPONS FROM the P.

Well that's going to come to an end in favor at least 40% off everything! YES! See, they recently got a new CEO, a dude from Apple and Target, and he's employing a new pricing structure to drum up more business. I can't say that I'm not PUMPED.

I can't say that you shouldn't be PUMPED.

New jeans, a sweet handkerchief, maybe a new bow tie or tie, maybe the illest wingtips ever, I don't even know, but I'm shopping furiously tonight after work.

And yo

YAO

You know we need that soundtrack to the SHOPOPPUNKPUMP



Too catchy for you, bros?

Get that melodic hardcore punk then, friends. And get PUMPED.

AND DON'T FORGET YOUR ROOTS!




PUMP! DON'T FORGET YOUR PUMP!

HUUUUMP DAY PUUUUMP UUUUUUHHHH UUUUHHH UUUPPP

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