Monday, May 9, 2011

weekend wrap-up again

Was debating whether or not I should even post something for Monday because of the insane awesomeness from my birther post on Friday (scroll down and read). Really proud of some of those sentences, friends.

Whatever, who is gonna be mad at a little weekend wrap-up action?

Another insane weekend on the books.

Friday night there was some Midnight Delight madness going on downtown where some shops stay open late. Lol, that's it. So we celebrated by stopping at this awesome store owned by our friends. They were just closing up, the party was just ending, but that didn't stop Heckyeahwoman and I from unleashing a tour de force of forced discounts, yelling and haggling until we got "the goddamned prices" that we "goddamned deserve".

I don't know, HYW bought some cool-looking, earth-friendly jewelry while one of the owners, ****, and I joked around. Yeah, I know business owners. Real entrepreneurs. Who do you know? 'Zactly.

Almost forgot, before shopping we had a very forgettable dinner at Ashley's. Great beer selection, decent service, very mediocre food. Prior to that I did a little record shopping at this stupid fucking shitty record store that has absolutely nothing I want to buy, ever. Probably been there 4 times, and each time it was GODDAMN impossible to FORCE myself to buy something I don't even really want. WTF.

And lol, they have every shitty hipster indie rock album flavor of the month, but not one GODDAMN death metal album from Gorgasm, Hate Eternal or Jungle Rot. Every time I go there with high hopes, the hopes get dashed, I get pissed and find myself shaking, holding a No Age record in my hands ready to fucking snap it in half.

And every time, Heckyeahwoman talks me out of my rage. Oh man if she wasn't around, I'd totally be the new owner of a cracked-in-half No Age record lol.

Got home, partied, watched No Reservations with Catherine Zeta-Jones and Aaron Eckhart, and that movie deserves a post of it's own. But more on that later...maybe.

So that was Friday night, told in a roundabout fashion.

Woke up Saturday morning REFRESHED AS FERK and ready to rock. Good thing, cause we got our coffee on, our eat on, I got my explosive 'rhea on and we were o u t t h e d o o r ready to shopppppp.

HYW had coupons for Kohl's, Macy's, and JC Penneys.

It was literally a blinding display of deal-raping. My wife put on a clinic. I've never seen so much shit acquired for so little.

First stop: Macy's. HYW wanted a bigger food processor and she had the coupons to make it happen. So I let her do her thing as I trolled the mall. 45 mins later, HYW appears with a mischievous smile on her face: not only did she snag a sweet food processor, but she got a dutch oven. You bet she did.

And she got a wooden spoon. Not sure why she felt the need to add a wooden spoon to our collection, but whatever, IT'S A WOODEN SPOON.

For some reason JC Penney's keeps sending us these $10-OFF coupons for a purchase of $10 or more. It doesn't make me any more likely to shop at Penney's without a coupon...cause I know next week they'll probably send me one. Or two.

Worth noting, this is the first time I've EVER been to Penney's and the Levi's Jeans were NOT on sale. First time ever, unbelievable. While I'm not totally in the market for a new pair of jeans, I'm still in the market for a new pair of jeans, if you know what I mean. So instead I bought two (2) Stafford Essentials basic t-shirts, priced to move at $6.99 each. Plus coupon, I paid about $4.23 for two shirts, eat shit.

Don't really though.

Last stop, Kohl's. Oddly I was shopped out, so I browsed the jeans, then walked down to Best Buy. With a confidence never really displayed before, I headed right to the CD section, found Ke$ha's new remix cd, and held it in my hands.

Just held it...with intent to purchase.

On the way to the checkout, ur boi got sidetracked by the music section, so I stopped in and pounded on some e-drum kits for twenty minutes. It's funny, I have my entry-level Yamaha e-kit, and I like the feel of that better than the newer, five-times-as-expensive kits that I tried.

Finally got the text message from HYW that she was done, so we met up in front of Kohls, and on the walk to the car, after spying the Ke$ha remix album I had just procured, she commented: "I did pretty well myself!"

Yeah you did Heckyeahwoman, yeah you did.

Kudos need to be givin' to HYW for trying, though unsuccessfully, to get me to stop for a beer after we were done shopping. Had to refuse, bros, needed to get my exercise on.

Just another in a long line of fantastic Saturdays.

Hate to do this, but I'm gettin' ready to party, and I still need material for HUMP DAY'S PUMP UP - so we're gonna leave the shenanigans of Saturday night for HUMP DAY - TO PUMP YOU UP.

CLUE: The old married couple went barhopping in the undergrad part of town, with PUMPED UP RESULTS!


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