Wednesday, December 8, 2010

HDPU: went to the mall last weekend

Had a nice little Saturday with Heckyeahwoman last weekend. I can only hope that this Saturday can be just as bomb. And PUMP FILLED.

Started out, hungover as FUCK - not her though - had some coffee, chillin' in my underwear as we decided what to do. We both needed to do a little shopping, so to the mall it is. Got there around 1:30ish, and headed straight for JC Penneys cause they had some sweet deals. Wound up buying a couple pairs of the illest jeans, and a money clip. Shit yeah, ILLEST JEANS PUMP UPINYA.

Heckyeahwoman bought some aw shit who am I kidding, I don't know what the hell she bought. WHATEVER YOUR WIFE SAYS IN ONE EAR AND OUT THE OTHER PUMP ALL DAY. All I did was carry the big ass bag around the rest of the day. YES HONEY I'LL CARRY THAT BAG PUMP OH YEAH.

We were both pretty PUPMED with our successes at Penneys that we decided to keep shoppin'. Going our separate ways seemed like the best way for us to buy whatever else we needed, get done, and start partying. So I headed over to American Eagle, and it was surreal.

Insane.

I've never been to that store when it was that crazy. There must've been like 80 employees there to greet me after every step I take. As usual, I ignored the dudes, and smiled and engaged the chicks. Shawties hollin' @ ur boi all day like wuh. BITCHES EYEIN' ME UP ON THE REGULAR SUPER PUMP!

I saw they had some deals, so I was lurkin', when I notice myself walking towards a woman. She appeared to be a manager, as she was maybe 10 years older than the 18-22 year slores jockin' me. That, and she had a sweet earpiece she was talking into. But it's not the earpiece that got my attention.

No, it was what she was saying into it, that got my goat. Now, keep in mind that this is inside an AMERICAN EAGLE store, not the oval office, the pentagon, the sidelines of a football game, or some high level boardroom meeting.

"C'mon team, we really need to focus today. We need to be a team and focus. Remember, focus".

Wait, wha?

The stressed out look on her face, the super-serious tone in her voice, and the penetrating stare in her eyes were all freakin' me out, man.

Dude I couldn't take it anymore, I bought my sweater and got the fo outta there. PUMPED 2 B OUTTA THE CRAZY-ZONE.

Shortly I found myself meeting back up with HYW, heading to Bath & Body Works, and all of a sudden a rush of highschool memories flooded over me. The innocent, corny-ass Bath & Body Works gifts I gave to high school girlfriends lol.

Man I was one corny-ass dude back in the day. Never stopped me from gettin' my mack on proper, though. CAN'T STOP THE PUMP!

Finally, shopping is done, PARTY MUHFUGGIN TIME. Yo we busted outta the mall, argued about what to do next, light spousal abuse may have ensued (PUMP!), and came to the conclusion that we should head to Damon's (PUMP), get some beers ($3 22oz DOMESTICS PUMP), and watch some football (DIE CAM NEWTON PUMP!).

lol @ HYW ordering the buffalo chicken sandwich, and me ordering the buffalo chicken grinder. LIVIN' THE ALL BUFFALO, ALL THE TIME LIFESTYLE MEGABONER PUMP!

Nice little Saturday. So PUMPED right now, I just want to go to back to THE MALL WITH MY AWESOME WIFE AND GET LOADED.

Yo where the cr00sh tunes at? Look below, silly, and get PUMPED


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hot Diggity Dawg bro.....or should I say neph. You and me, we live the same lifestyle! Last week Vicky & I were at the mall. Straight to Sears to get another garage door opener. We needed another one for her Hummer. Yeah, that's right, my girl drives a Hummer.....candy apple red! After going to the "as Seen on TV" store where I bought some of those buttons that add an inch to your jeans we headed over to the food court. Slice o the day was sausage & mushroom which I devoured quickly and then finished off my girl's Panda Jacks terryaki chicken plate. We roll the same neph!

uncl Mike

Anonymous said...

ke$ha needs to wash her HURRRRR