Monday, August 2, 2010

the massage

So Heckyeahwoman got me a couples massage for my 29th birthday a couple days ago. Holy shit I'm 29. Goddamn.

Anyway, I knew we were destined for awesome almost immediately. Check this out: So we get there, check in, go change into the stupid, huge robes & sandals, and come out to this corny ass waiting room area.

There are probably 5 other people in there waiting - a mix of couples and single weirdos. Whatevs, it's dark, and I'm about to get a massage. And I'm about to be 29, FUGG YEAH. Finally, some lady, probably a masseuse, walks in, calls some dude's (ha, more like dud's) name; she introduces herself, and takes him out the door, but before she left, she had something nice to say to all of us. A simple two (2) words: "enjoy everyone".


What the fuck does that even mean? What a weird thing to say. Immediately I share my confusion with Heckyeahwoman, and the rest of the paying customers in the waiting room: "did she mean enjoy everyone - or enjoy, comma, everyone?"

Enjoy everyone.

Enjoy, everyone.

Obviously, a little comma can make a huge difference. If that trick is telling me to enjoy everyone (that I see today? in the waiting room right now? that works at the spa? wtf?), that's kind of weird.

More likely, she meant "enjoy (the massages), everyone". But that lack of a pause between words, combined with that dirty little smile as she said it, had me wondering.

Anyway, the massage was awesome, and it felt so good. My chick could have been hotter, but then again, so could have Heckyeahwoman's.

Since it was my first massage, Heckyeahwoman wanted to know what my favorite part was. Without even thinking, I answered, "the head".


1 comment:

Tampa 'comma' bitch said...

What? NO happy ending! WTF!!!