Monday, April 19, 2010

this is kinda relevant

When I don't have anything to write about, I usually just steal somebody else's ideas!?!? Works for me!

Check out this advice column I read a couple weeks ago. My head almost exploded.

Colorado Springs, Colo.: After six years of dating, my fiance proposed several months ago and our wedding is planned for July. I was ecstatic and blissful. We discussed a prenup before the engagement and both agreed it would be beneficial ... until he actually presented it to me. Now I feel slapped in the face. For background, he is wealthy (upward of $3 million). I am employed and stable (worth about $75,000). Neither of us has children. This prenup states that neither of us will be executors of the other's estate, that I agree to receive no life insurance benefit, and that in the event of divorce I will accept a total sum of $2,000. Essentially, after 20 years of marriage, he could leave me with about 0.1 percent of his current worth. I know I need to speak with an attorney, but I am mortified to tell anyone what my fiance thinks about me. When I attempt to discuss the issue with my fiance, he calls me a liar and a gold-digger. This hurts because I am neither, but it feels like this prenup prevents us from ever building a life together. Should I run from the man I love?

Emily Yoffe: Who's the beneficiary of his life insurance policy, the dog? It's rather odd that after six years together you are just finding out that your fiance is financially controlling and punitive, but there it is. Maybe once he sat down with a lawyer, his brain switched from romance to litigation, and he lost sight of the fact that you two hope to never have to exercise the divorce contingency. Yes, you need your own attorney, and maybe a couples counselor, since your justifiable objections to the prenup have your boyfriend calling you abusive names. Put the wedding on hold until you resolve all the issues that have been stirred up.

Wait, what?

Did I read that right? Do these boxes think they're owed something? For a wedding ending in divorce? When it's probably their own fault?

Maybe I'm old fashioned, but is being financially responsible the same as being "financially controlling and punitive"?

Lol @ "gold digger" being an abusive name. I've called my owner mother worse names than that.

OK, the no life insurance benefit is a bit crazy. But should the ending of a marriage really result in this slore getting a bunch of the husband's shit for free? She's pissed because when she inevitably stops puffing on his dong, he decides that ain't cool and drops her like the ho-cake she is. And she thinks that she deserves more than $2000.

What really gets me is how she cries, "this prenup prevents us from ever building a life together". So once they get married, they won't be able to build a life together? That can't be right, because when she refers to "building their life together", I think it's a fair assumption that they will be married. So I guess I'm not totally clear on how a prenuptial agreement would prevent a married couple from "building a life together", assuming they're both in it for the long haul.

I think what she meant to say was that the prenup would prevent her from building a life on her own, with someone else's money, post-divorce.

And I think what I meant to say was, "FUCK YOU, GOLD-DIGGING SLUT".

Basically, this is what's wrong with our country: the fact that thinking like this is acceptable. The idea that she is somehow entitled to a chunk of someone else's money, even though she had nothing to do with it. Upon reading not just this unintentional cry for help, but also Dear Prudence's advice, it's clearly evident that Dear Prudence not only 100% condones women being a complete financial drain, she's admitting that women are not able to take care of themselves, independent of a man.

We here at heck yeah, man completely disagree; and furthermore, we wholly and totally not only believe women to be fully capable of financially supporting themselves, but we encourage them to support their men too. We are big fans of women - brains and boobs and all. But mostly boobs.

I wasn't going to get a prenup for my wedding, but after reading this, I think I'm going to look into it. And yes, there will be blowjob clause.

1 comment:

Tampa Gold Digga Digga said...

Aren't all women gold-diggers? I mean that's why they wrote a song about it.

What's true is trve.