Thursday, July 31, 2008

get mah shotgun billybob, them illegals are comin!

i'm sure some of you have at least seen the email making the rounds: "FW: social security changes". i was excluded from the first round of it going out, but lucky for me, i was eventually included (!!!). in this age of the polarization/dumbing down of the american people, this email fits right in. there's no real information, no fact-checking, just playing on the fears of the average hardworking american. aye, but there's the rub: are you an average hardworking american? highly unfuckinglikely. chances are, your intelligence is below average, evidenced by the fact that you most likely just blindly signed this petition. and if you're going to look me in the eye, and honestly tell me that you're hardworking, i'll tell you to fuck off. so now that we got that out of the way...

here's the email in question:

PLEASE SEND THIS ON TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ADD YOUR NAME AT THE BOTTOM, IF > YOU WISH. PLEASE HELP US HELP EVERYONE.. > > > PLEASE READ AND FORWARD TO AT LEAST ONE PERSON. > >> SOCIAL SECURITY CHANGES > > It does not matter if you personally like or dislike Bush. You need to sign > this petition and flood his e-mail box with e-mails that tell him that, even > if the House passes this bill, he needs to veto it. It is already > impossible to live on Social Security alone. If the government gives > benefits to 'illegal' aliens who have never contributed, where does that > leave those of us who have paid into Social Security all our working lives? > > As stated below, the Senate voted this week to allow 'illegal' aliens access > to Social Security benefits. > Attached is an opportunity to sign a petition that requires citizenship for > eligibility to that social service.

holy shit, i could probably stop by your house and tell you that unless you give me $500 right now, you're going to die tomorrow...and you know what? there's a good chance i'd be $500 richer.

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